quick!!! how to remember yourself!!!

bay-bee...they want you to forget

We’re always changing. Yes, that’s it - we’re continually altering, adding to the number of things that make us up. And subtracting. Yes, subtracting. We are moving bodies of water constantly being entered, upset, and challenged. We’re poured into, tested, and stolen from. We evaporate some days and become even more on others. We house multitudes. Our bodies of water consume and make waste. Consume, consume, make waste, make waste. I go to the news and feel this body rejecting the narrative. You go to the news and learn that the things you once wanted to do, the things that used to excite you, no longer make sense in a place where such fundamental living rights are denied our planet-kin. And there are evils in your home. You know that. I know that. Sometimes, we can’t find any kindness for miles. This time last year, I suspected I had to change, and I think I was right. Change is a side effect of living; intentionality is the by-product of deep listening. We have travelled far from ourselves, haven’t we? And wasn’t some of it

1. necessary

2. fashionable

3. a survival technique?

I get it. I am it. But if you’re not careful, you can turn around and find the path here has disappeared, along with your reason to be your energy, tenderness, soul-full-ness, sense of morality, and ideas. Suddenly, you're in a familiar and demanding wilderness—keep going, hoard your money and time, pay the bills, meet deadlines, raise and support yourself, keep raising and supporting yourself—supporting yourself and others. God. Suddenly, you’re in a wilderness that demands you Heal Right Now…

or risk making the same disastrous mistakes.

When I feel the most misaligned or out of sorts, it almost always comes down to one thing—

I have somehow, out of fear, compliance, or habit, muzzled the voice that guides me. I’m so ready to be beautifully in sync with her again, and I know this means listening to the silences, getting even more rest, losing some phone numbers, and reintroducing myself to myself and those I love. It means resistance and speaking out when I know something is wrong. It means music; hold the lyrics. It means realigning and understanding my value system. If it’s no, it must be no, even when the money is right. Even if it speaks to my untenable vanity. If it is a Yes, I must Yes with my whole body or risk being a human moving unconsciously through a list of inconsequential movements. I must risk repeating my coping strategies. The State of Things demands that I listen to my moving heart.

The State of Things

demands that you listen

to your moving heart.